Diary Entry #1: Watchdog Duty Again, Yawn...

Dear Diary,

Time: 10:30 p.m., E.S.T. , January 3, 2005

Location: Living Room, Front Porch

Instructions: Investigate hovering police helicopter, find criminal allegedly hiding in woods surrounding home

Results: Police helicopter left, I arose from the front porch,
scratched on the screen door, and was admitted by loyal owner, cowering inside. My trusty partner, Ashley the greyhound, former lady professional racer, remained in her previous state of unconsciousness on her plush bed located on living room floor. She did, however, open her eyes and watch me settle in my own plush bed beside hers.

Evaluation: Loyal owner should install more floodlights and not disturb my sleep.

Signed with frustration,

Abel
(former resident of Animal Shelter, currently head of household)